Post by mathilde on Jan 3, 2007 9:42:25 GMT
I really need it 
I wish to share with you, my fellow Madrigalians, my experience of the first day in my New Job. This is cross-posted, and may (actually, it does) contain several Rude Words:
--------------------------------------------------------
*F**k**g slut*
f**k**g. Lazy. Filthy. Slovenly. Slattern.
I started a new job yesterday, but didn't sit in my new desk till today, because there was a temp using it yesterday.
I got in this morning at 0800, and decided to spend the first hour or so sorting out all the stuff on the desk and in the drawers and cupboard. An hour?! It was 1135 by the time I finally got the mess sorted (and got downstairs for a f*cken fag).
I estimate the previous occupant of this desk must have been there for at least 5 years, and during that time I don't reckon she EVER threw anything away, and she most certainly didn't clean the desk.
It was bloody rabid. Amongst the things I came across during me little adventure were a DIRTY spoon in one of the drawers, a scrumpled-up used tissue, hairpins with f**k**g strands of hair still hanging off them, an ancient apple core, a variety of unidentifiable grotty-looking THINGS, and what looked horribly like part of a tooth. The desk surface was f*cken filthy; so were the bottoms of the drawers and the insides of the cupboard. I can't say too much about the disgusting filth I cleaned off the keyboard and out of the mouse; it makes me
every time I think about it.
And the papers! At least they weren't dirty, but the silly cow (see above re: never throwing anything out) had reams and reams of out-of-date shite that no ding could ever, possibly, need to look at again: every glossy folder full of promotional bollix she'd ever received from any printer, designer, caterer or purveyor of kinky sex; change-of-address requests going back several years (the changes had all been made - I checked the database). Why, for f**k**g Jesus' sake WHY, would you keep a change of address form from 2002, requesting a name change from 'Blyth' to 'Byth', and a million of its mates?
I now have a giant carton (removalists' book/wine size) of miscellaneous old papers that I'm 90% sure will never be needed; plus a smaller box (photocopier paper size) of stuff I'm only about 70% sure no ding will ever want to look at again, stashed away under my desk. They will very probably be thrown away in the next few months; I really didn't have the strength today.
I also delivered several armfuls of crud to slut-woman at her new desk.
"Oh, I thought you might need that"
"No, I do not f**k**g well need the g*d*n mother-f**king manual from some f**ken course on Making Wimmin's Voices Heard that you did in two thousand and f**k**g three, thank you very bloody much you shite-faced idle old hooer."
I'm going to have a shower. I feel.....dirty
-----------------------------------------------------
Smileys were used most effectively and artistically in the original post; they don't translate, so feel free to add your own
s where it seems appropriate. 
I wish to share with you, my fellow Madrigalians, my experience of the first day in my New Job. This is cross-posted, and may (actually, it does) contain several Rude Words:
--------------------------------------------------------
*F**k**g slut*
f**k**g. Lazy. Filthy. Slovenly. Slattern.
I started a new job yesterday, but didn't sit in my new desk till today, because there was a temp using it yesterday.
I got in this morning at 0800, and decided to spend the first hour or so sorting out all the stuff on the desk and in the drawers and cupboard. An hour?! It was 1135 by the time I finally got the mess sorted (and got downstairs for a f*cken fag).
I estimate the previous occupant of this desk must have been there for at least 5 years, and during that time I don't reckon she EVER threw anything away, and she most certainly didn't clean the desk.
It was bloody rabid. Amongst the things I came across during me little adventure were a DIRTY spoon in one of the drawers, a scrumpled-up used tissue, hairpins with f**k**g strands of hair still hanging off them, an ancient apple core, a variety of unidentifiable grotty-looking THINGS, and what looked horribly like part of a tooth. The desk surface was f*cken filthy; so were the bottoms of the drawers and the insides of the cupboard. I can't say too much about the disgusting filth I cleaned off the keyboard and out of the mouse; it makes me
every time I think about it.And the papers! At least they weren't dirty, but the silly cow (see above re: never throwing anything out) had reams and reams of out-of-date shite that no ding could ever, possibly, need to look at again: every glossy folder full of promotional bollix she'd ever received from any printer, designer, caterer or purveyor of kinky sex; change-of-address requests going back several years (the changes had all been made - I checked the database). Why, for f**k**g Jesus' sake WHY, would you keep a change of address form from 2002, requesting a name change from 'Blyth' to 'Byth', and a million of its mates?
I now have a giant carton (removalists' book/wine size) of miscellaneous old papers that I'm 90% sure will never be needed; plus a smaller box (photocopier paper size) of stuff I'm only about 70% sure no ding will ever want to look at again, stashed away under my desk. They will very probably be thrown away in the next few months; I really didn't have the strength today.
I also delivered several armfuls of crud to slut-woman at her new desk.
"Oh, I thought you might need that"
"No, I do not f**k**g well need the g*d*n mother-f**king manual from some f**ken course on Making Wimmin's Voices Heard that you did in two thousand and f**k**g three, thank you very bloody much you shite-faced idle old hooer."
I'm going to have a shower. I feel.....dirty
-----------------------------------------------------
Smileys were used most effectively and artistically in the original post; they don't translate, so feel free to add your own
s where it seems appropriate. 
