dammit

[aubrey]

Or rather, you were right, Exco:

Bugs Across Globe Are Evolving to Eat Plastic, Study Finds

[excoriator]

Well I'm delighted to hear it Aubrey. I have great faith in evolution. If a substance contains chemical energy then it is a potential foodstuff, and evolution will find a way of taking advantage of it.

You may have heard about the wax moth. This creature lays its eggs in or near honey bees' hives. The larvae, when they emerge from their eggs head for the hive and proceed to dine on the wax. I assume the secrete a hormone that make the bees think they are harmless. A few insects manage this trick.

Anyway it turns out that the chemical composition of a Tesco bag is pretty similar to beeswax and these little creatures can subsist on it to maturity! There is very little new under the sun.

Good to hear from you. I hope you are back to normal now. I could do with your advice regarding a kitten we've acquired. It appears to have two aims. One is to explore the fireplace and climb up the chimney, and the other is to climb the curtains and walk back and fore along the curtain rail. Mrs E. frets and fears for her falling off and I am despatched to get the steps and get her down. Any advice to stop this short of bricking up the chimney and removing the curtains, both of which have been vetoed?

[aubrey]

I'll ask Chris, but the things you describe are soon grown out of - or at least I would have said that had one of ours not started up again. But I think she will stop again before too long. I think Chris will probably use distraction.

I'm ok, at least getting more able to cope with the trache and damaged leg than I was; I don't panic if a tube gets blocked, or I have to lie down, like I used to. So that's something. And generally I quite enjoy myself, dossing about the place. How are you doing?

[excoriator]

Still hanging on by my fingertips here. I'm still going to Philosophy in Pubs and yesterday tried to give a presentation on Bertrand's Paradox (still unresolved after 134 years) - look it up.

Sadly a group of cheery beer-bellies cracking jokes and guffawing at deafening volume made it almost impossible to exlain a few simple ideas about probability, which rendered it incomprehensible to half of our group. I gave up when random numbers became attacked for absence of ethical considerations (a retired social worker). I suppose some random numbers might have been LGBT or something. Who knows. I got a large glass of vino collapso and felt better about it all.

Hard on its heels came another failure today. I foolishly volunteered to repair an ancient super 8 movie projector and quickly found a bit of burnt out track and a short circuited capacitor, only to find that the thing had further faults so I'll have to chase and repair them too. Really not my day. The kitten is turning into a very opinionated cat who tramples keyboards, computer and piano, bites my pen when I write, tears hearing aids from my ears and spills glasses of wine.

Hopefully she'll calm down. She is currently cursor chasing on my desk. Must go. Tea is ready and she has to be locked in my study so we can eat it in comfort. Keep in touch.

[Joker]

May 7, 2022 14:33:30 GMT aubrey said:

Or rather, you were right, Exco:

Bugs Across Globe Are Evolving to Eat Plastic, Study Finds

Are you saying that... life finds a way?

Side note: the pasty covering of pasties, IIRC, were not supposed to be eaten, originally, but only protect the foodstuffs within from contamination until the ploughman ate them. More of a back note, really, because we didn't evolve to eat the covering, we just chose to, and started protecting it in turn while making it more edible, I suppose.

I'm sure the things that can kill us are evolving/turning up faster than our ability to evolve a tolerance, let alone taste for them.

[excoriator]

I think life WILL find a way. It has a good record of this, as is evidenced by our existence starting from a few random chemicals. Well, more accurately evolution will.

It seems to me that a pie without a crust is simply not worth eating. In some cases it is better than the filling.

We are lucky here in that there are two first rate butchers shops. One is a world class BBC Food and Farming Award butcher, but the other one is celebrated more for his pork pies. He sells literally thousands a day to white van men who can be seen, their vans thoughtfully parked on the double yellow lines causing traffic chaos whilst a line of them extends from the shop doorway.

I don't blame them. They have everything. A slightly crispy carapace offering just the right amount of resistance to a bite, which quickly melts in the mouth and a delicious salt pork interior. Only a fool would eat them cold. when hot they are a meal fit for a king.

And without their casing, what would they be? A chunk of pork mince, salty and nourishing, but nothing to write to Aubrey about.

I can't remenber which Victorian billionaire it was who refused to believe in the existence of napkin rings because nobody could be so poor as not to afford freshly laundered napkins for every meal, but I feel a bit like him in claiming that, surely, surely, nobody would miss the charm of a layer of pastry infused with the meaty juices from within!

Here's a link to the Butcher in question:

www.yell.com/biz/g-h-pearson-pork-butchers-wirral-1151107/

You have to be there just before lunch. They are not available all day.

[aubrey]

The Fall's bass player used to work in his dad's pie shop when they weren't touring or recording; the equipment was kept in a room over the shop.

[aubrey]

Hey up, Exco.

[excoriator]

Quick update:

I am one of the unlucky ones to have had an allergic reaction to the Moderna 'Spikevax' vaccine. After the first one, I developed a small raised patch of dry skin on my left ankle but thought nothing of it. Then I got a booster and it rapidly mushroomed into eczema all around that ankle and soon after the other ankle went the same merry way. Both spread up to my knees and I visited the doctor.

He said he was unconcerned by the rash (Well, it wasn't on his ankles as I swiftly pointed out) and said he thought it would go away, but was concerned at my swollen ankles and has prescribed 'water pills'. One of my daughters had had the same rash and got rid of it with 1% hydrocortisone cream. I bought some, and being curious tried it only on one leg. The other leg I treated only with muttered curses and hard looks.

It DOES seem to be having some effect on the leg its applied to, but amazingly, the other leg seems to be doing far better! Explain that!

I keep trying to recall the name of a portly male comedian on TV who finished his show dressed as a hard bitten housewife expressing her views over a garden fence. Of a friend who died I recall her remarking

"She were under the doctor for years with these 'orrible 'eads, but it were 'er legs wot carried 'er off in the end!"

The swelling seems to be going down with the rash, and the only effect of the water pills seems to be that I am peeing more often, but amazingly it appears to be colourless crystal clear spring water! I haven't been tempted to taste it yet. The cat seems fascinated and follows me into the toilet to watch with close attention, departing at high speed when I flush the toilet.

You wonder what is going on in their heads don't you. I am currently being observed with evident disapproval from a vantage point on top of a pile of sheet music on top of a bookcase - the highest point in the room.

I was delighted that only days after I placed the curse of Exco on the useless Truss she was gone. But sadly there are probably even worse barrel scrapings waiting in the wings to take over.

[aubrey]

[excoriator]

Hi Aubrey. Good to hear from you. I trust you are still out of hospital and recovering.

I've been having fun with ChatGPT, getting it to write computer code. Its surprisingly good. I asked it to write code for converting a Text message to morse and flash it on the onboard LED of an Arduino and it worked first time. I copied what it has written into the arduino IDE, compiled it and downloaded it and the little board is broadcasting my name in Morse code on my desk as I type.

Its shite at maths though. I asked it some undergraduate level questions about primitive polynomials and it gave me the wrong answer. When I pointed this out, it apologised 'for the confusion' and gave me another wrong answer. How's that for political nous? 'Confusion' implies its my fault. It wasn't. It needs watching!

Hope you are in good shape. We are ok here, and had to leave Tesco today giggling foolishly at spotting a plastic pack containing clearly heavy-duty industrial corned beef bearing the words 'Selected Cuts of Corned Beef' The hilarity was assisted by a Tesco notice inviting us to celebrate the coronation with a tube of cut price Pringles! I don't know whether its me or the world that is going crazy. One of us, sure as hell is.

Will you be celebrating and taking the oath of allegiance? I'm planning to give it a miss as seems everyone is around here. The indifference has reached fever pitch. Eurovision seems of more interest. The Arena is just downriver from our house, about two miles away and visible. Concerts there are mercifully audible only as a distant mindless thumping. The mindless shrieking and bawling and guitar abuse that accompanies it is higher frequency and mercifully inaudible.

Our cat has, at last, decided that the electrically heated bed I made for her IS an acceptable place to rest. It has taken her months to decide its not some kind of trap and now curls up happily in it if and only if it has one of my jackets spread over it. I can't work out what goes through her head. Another seldom missed routine is to leap onto the table and watch intently as I take my daily statin! What is so fascinating?

[aubrey]

If anyone's still around, here's a page from Louis Armstrong's Autobiography:

[excoriator]

A bit like W.C.Fields on belief.

"Everyone needs a belief. I believe I'll have another beer!"