Wot I saw on the Bat TV

[mimi]

What an interesting picture. An early paparazzo? It looks like a camera, a jumbo box Brownie, or perhaps a concertina. And what a strong coat collar he must have.

[Pink Betty]

....or maybe Daz has given it to him through the neck?

[kipper]

It's a lovely picture Dazza

That's when film had a decent amount of silver in it....and lenses were made of glass and were ground by someone who gave a damn. 3 zillion pixels don't matter a fig without a good German lens, mein freund.

[kipper]

What's been on the Bat Box?

Friday - drove around a lot dodging swollen rivers. Running children to oh-so-important appointments. Children love to see stranded cars floating about .... they are doubly interesting when the people are still in them looking sulky !

Caught :
BBC News 24
looking at flood pictures. Some people in Birmingham had damaged laminate floors. The regional reporters asked daft people daft questions ...and got answers !

Frightening shots of people in tracksuits being rescued by fully-kitted disaster workers - one man was being brought to safety in a dinghy. The water was at least 20cms deep and he was dingh-eyd 30 metres from the deepest parts (outside the Post Office) to the Waitrose car park. There, 2 bored paramedics consoled him about his soggy trainers.

Other "victims of the flood" said it was all very wet and that they had "gotten drenched". In other areas a soldier had been swept away, possibly to his death ... but no camera crews could be arsed to visit that location or interview the TA

filled washing machine; glued broken household item

Young Girls Who Wanted Breast Surgery (C3?)

After late tea, watched half of this.
It was a disturbing program. The tone was as normal ... here's some dunderheads and we've collected their lives into a story that you might find in "Shag-A-Do" or "Bollox" magazine.

What was disturbing:
1) The girls (15-19 ish) were having /planning boob jobs - likely before they had even finsihed growing. The common desire was not sexual or boyfirend-oriented, but to "look nice " or "be confident". How did we ever get here?

2) The vocabulary of the girls was likely to be approx. 500 words. Most of the words were lifted straight out of TV or Magazines.

3) The parents (mostly Mums, but some wooden headed Dads were skulking) tried to "persuade them not to do it" but mostly either paid for it...or drove them to the clinic in the 4x4.
Most of the parents were similar to drugged Moose, who were looking for the next interesting patch of tundra. All of the Parents thought that moral fibre was something that Kellogs had brought out.

4) Most of the parents were not poor chavs , but noooveaux riche or close to it.

5) The girls had their boob jobs at a clinic. The "Surgeon" was suitably casual and relaxed - he must be proud that so much training has resulted in such a worthwhile scalpel-based income.
The Surgeons drew blue lines on the young girl's tits with a marker pen - which made it all look very professional.
Friends turned up and complimented the girls on their new paps - "they look really nice".

6) One girl wanted to start a "glamma modlin career". The program showed her first step on that career ladder - a visit to a cartoon photo studio, where the girl handed over a cheque and a middle aged man took risque photos... "for me portfolio".

One set of parents were "now glad" that their 15 year old daughter had shot off to Belgium to have an early boob job; made legally unavailable in UK.
"She's much happier now after the breast surgery- and that's the important thing" they both said.

washed up - cleaned down kitchen counters

Jonathan Ross Show (BBC 1)
As Ross has become more of a media shitbag than he ever was ...and the "guests" (forgot list - switched off after intro) were a collection of lesser shits, decided to read.


Anyone else see something ? This is an open review thread, you know.

[Daz Madrigal]

Easily led.

If us menfolk were so hidebound to fashion we'd all have lips like bicycle inner tubes lke Sandy but its funny how some trends just don't catch on.

Its just supply and demand, kids today dont even eat off plates let alone bother with leaving crumbs on the floor but when it comes to getting a lip tattoo of 'I love Sandy' my finger was already, shakily, on the zietgeist.

modblog.bmezine.com/2005/08/25/sluts-and-nutters

[Daz Madrigal]

<< Jonathan Ross Show (BBC 1)
As Ross has become more of a media shitbag than he ever was ...and the "guests" (forgot list - switched off after intro) were a collection of lesser shits, decided to read. >>

Its gone downmarket...I think Parkinson or Wogan said there was a limit to the number of 'stars' worth listening to. I don't even listen to his radio show any longer.

The same goes for Jools Holland...sometimes the 'dross' - i like that word! - was worth putting up with. But no longer..its ALL dross from beginning to end.

Why can't everyone be like Gene Wilder...unassumng, laid-back, intelligent, unconcerned about celebrity and effortlessly funny without being abusive or rude.

[Daz Madrigal]

<< 2) The vocabulary of the girls was likely to be approx. 500 words. Most of the words were lifted straight out of TV or Magazines. >>

That would be 450 more than the inmates of big brother.

[Daz Madrigal]

<< looking at flood pictures. Some people in Birmingham had damaged laminate floors. The regional reporters asked daft people daft questions ...and got answers ! >>

The people who lived there knew that the place was prone to floods but the LABOUR council decided to build some new houses there. If they'd looked at the history they'd have found that the area had previously contained a lake.

[kipper]

Jools Holland - there's a strange brew. He's flacid enough to be an "interviewer" I suppose. But it's weird, he's introduced Music shows for years and is a musician. But if he was playing that appaling "big band swing" in my back garden ...I'd make sure I was out. Dammit - I'd make sure I didn't have a garden - soas to discourage any ideas.

"Popular" music is always a conflict in terms, though. Music becomes popular, when the majority of people don't care if it's on or not :-)

[kipper]

"Why can't everyone be like Gene Wilder..."

Because there's not enough hair to go round.




War! (damn)

[piccione]

////Thanks ever so much but I'll stick to my tree where I can look down on everybody.////

Right, Sands - that’s it. I tried with peaceful means and suggested alternative accommodation, but you wouldn’t have any of it.

Unfortunately, I’m now going to have to smoke you out....

Besides, some humble grovelling ‘on the ground‘ will only do you good. ;D

[piccione]

////Anyone else see something ? This is an open review thread, you know./////

.....but I ain’t got Bat TV, Kip!

And our ’mortal human’ TV channels seem to be forever stuck on Sky Sports - or on PS2 (now 3), for ‘some’ reason....

But looking at your reviews I feel quite reassured. I’d /even/ rather watch golf or snooker on TV <yawn> than some kids having their tits perked.

[piccione]

PS: Sands - forget about what I said. You can keep your tree house.

I’ve just seen the pic of that massive beer fridge.

That’s my new home!

Don’t worry, I’ll change it over to low energy consumption.

[kipper]

////Anyone else see something ? This is an open review thread, you know./////

.....but I ain’t got Bat TV, Kip!

You don't need BatTV ! There's just as much slurry to discuss on Regular Persons TV....even though there's less bats in it.

--------------

P.S. - Sandy's hut is MINE , is that clear? Who else deserves a box attached to a tree than Thee Bat?

I need a place to unwind. - BatCave-Gotham-Wayne Mansion, Gotham-Wayne, Wayne-Gotham-Batcave ... I'm communting every day ! Don't I deserve a second home in the country? (possibly buy to let, of course)

After a long day crimefighting, I think I need to put my Bat feet up (literally) and have a cup of batTea in peace.

[kipper]

TV Review

SATURDAY
The Last Aztec (or something Azteccy ) C4?
Only saw one thing ... but what a thing !
An Author-Journo took us on a personal view journey through the whole Cortez-Aztec takeover story. Imagine an intelligent and insightful Kieth Richards crossed with Nick Blomfield presenting a history program.
It was tremendous - the BEST THING I have seen for yonks.

Great little stories, good facts, lovely contrasting scenes and a lush, with a great voice, delivering the whole story, in a wholly unique way.

Brilliant.

SUNDAY
Didn't watch nuffink - country persuits all day then beddy-bys